Friday, October 10, 2014

My response to Vogue's "By 30" bucket list

Don’t get me wrong, my day looks – or night ones, for that matter – are not apt to inspire a spread in any of the hottest fashion magazines, but I thought I was doing all right in the style department.

I’ve got a pretty impressive shoe and handbag collection as well as enough jeans and cashmere sweaters to clothe a small nation.  

But a bucket list of fashion risks recently released by Vogue magazine entitled 10 Fashion Risks You Should Have Taken by the Age of 30 proves I am woefully inept in the sartorial department.

Judging by my response to the ten items on their list, I scored a D+, at best.

According to Vogue, a woman should have tried the following by her 30th birthday:

1. Stepped out in thigh-high boots and a miniskirt at least once.
I do own a pair of black thigh-high Donald Pliner boots, but I can’t for the life of me remember the last time I wore them. Nixay on the miniskirt, by the way. As you can see, I am off to a rip-roaring start.

2. Adapted something from a school girl’s uniform-pleated skirt, Peter Pan collar, or over-the-knee socks for your working wardrobe.
Before becoming a SAHM, I worked in politics…and in broadcast news prior to that. Had I showed up to city hall – or the TV station – in a school girl’s uniform or over-the-knee socks, I may have been removed from office – and most definitely ridiculed into oblivion by my camera crew.

3. Exposed a cowboy boot.
Check! And I’ve got a straw beach hat to match. Brownie points.

4. Taken to the streets in a nightgown.
Does making a mad dash down the driveway to fetch the morning paper count? My hunch is no.

5. Done sequin pants for day.
First, I think the writer of the list meant “don,” and, secondly, I didn’t know there was such a thing. I hope they are lined with silk because, otherwise, they sound horribly uncomfortable.

6. Gone goth, punk, or grunge for the night.
Allow me to preface my response by stating that I have nothing but love for my brethren who have a penchant for going over to the dark side, but the closest I’ve come to going goth is wearing Chanel’s “Black Stain” on my toes in the wintertime.

7. Reinvented an oversize men’s blazer as a dress.
Have you seen my husband’s blazers? A former NFL lineman, he wears a size 3X. His blazers can in no way pass for a dress.

8. Blown your tax return on a pair of skinny leather pants and regretted it.
Nope. But once upon a time, I did spend nearly twice my car note on approximately 25 tubes of MAC lipstick after receiving word that my favorite color was being discontinued. And, no, I still don’t regret it.

9. Worn a “signature” hat.
Somehow, I don’t think this limited edition NFL Bud Light cap Scott brought home from this year’s NFL draft party counts.

10. Referenced at least two of the following for inspiration: Joan Jett, Jane Birkin, Bianca Jagger, Stevie Nicks, Kurt Cobain, or Anita Pallenberg. 
I have fantasized about wearing a white suit jacket à la the one Bianca Jagger wore when she married Mick: 

But I don’t have the courage nor cleavage to pull it off.

What about you? How did you fare with this list?

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20 comments:

  1. Some of the things on the list is a bit weird lol!

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    Replies
    1. I'm with you on that one, Delabelle. I mean, I consider myself fairly "with it" as far as fashion is concerned -- I mean, at least as far as the classics go, anyway.

      But judging by how I fared with this list I am woefully mistaken; lol

      Thank you so much for commenting, and enjoy your weekend. :-)

      Delete
  2. Good grief.... school girl uniform. Laughed out of all male office or their latest fantasy neither of which I want to be. Sequin pants. Ewwwww. No. My Fall fashion is my closet of knee h8gh boots. Leggins or jeggins in an assortment of fabrics and adorable undershirts with those cardigans that hang low in front..... or same with tights its cold here and a mini skirt. I love fall. Dont care what others thinkni am comfortable.

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    1. You are speaking my language, Ray. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Comfort is the name of the game. I mean, I know it is possible to be both pulled together and comfortable. Now, I know I'm not always the personification of this. But, still. Lol

      Thank you for taking the time to comment, my friend!

      xo

      Delete
  3. All I can say is, thank heavens I'm turning 30 in less than a month. Then I can officially ignore this entire list. ;)

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    1. LOL The list is for things that you should have *already* done by 30, my friend.

      What, no sequined pants for you???? Tisk, tisk! Vogue frowns upon you, too.

      p.s. I'm 37.

      Have a great weekend.

      Delete
  4. They don't live in the real world... Um... I spent the first half of my 20s in goth/grunge/mod (whatever) garb when going out. Seems stupid that it's like a right of passage to do something like that for one night.... Oh, you're so daring! Maybe the equivalent for me would've been to dress preppy and go to the goth club. Oh wait. I did that too. :) Vogue is stupid. -Hannah

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    1. Um, Hannah? You are too funny! We totally "get" each other's humor.

      I like you.

      Thank you so much for taking the time to comment!

      Have a great weekend.

      Delete
  5. I'm turning 30 next month, and I've done exactly NONE of these (unless you count the fact tha I've worn my old knee high socks from my actual high school uniform underneath my skinny jeans when I've worn boots). Overall, I think it's a pretty silly list, as I don't feel like I'm any worse off for not doing any of it. :)

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Right, Natalie? My thoughts exactly.

      I'll keep with my regular mom uniform of jeans, Minnetonka moccasins/Bog boots, and a simple yet chic cashmere sweater, thankyouverymuch! lol

      Thank you so much for taking a moment to comment.

      xo

      Delete
  6. Welp I guess I'm a big fashion FAIL!!! LOL! Have a great weekend Courtney!

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    1. That makes two of us, girlfriend. But we still do alright, if I do say so myself. ;-)

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  7. The only one I might, might be able to check off is the sequin pants. I mean, they have a few sequins on the back pockets. I'm gonna count that, otherwise I have nothing : ( I'm really not into fashion trends so much as I'm into wearing things that look good on me. I think that makes me a winner.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Hey, there! I'm totally high-fiving you on this one: Yes, OF COURSE that makes you a winner. Marching to the (fashion) beat of your own drum and knowing what makes you not only look good, but *feel* good is what it's all about, if you ask me.

      Why should simply following a trend outweigh that? That's nonsense.

      And by the way, don't real all-sequined pants sound nauseatingly painful. Or itchy...which, like I said initially, sounds painful...

      Thank you so much for commenting!

      xo

      Delete
  8. Omg, you and me both girlfriend. I have NEVER done anything on that list. In what country/city are they??? Living in Montana doesn't exactly lend itself to stepping out in fashion plate clothing. (Although we're not that behind the times, it's just not... practical.) In fact... I might have to do a counter post to that Vogue article, starting with... "I have never spent more than $26 on a pair of jeans."

    I love your responses to those items... you're so much more real world!

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    1. "It's just not practical." See, that's my underlying sentiment behind virtually all of my responses! And I'd be lying if I blamed my feelings in being 37 with kids. Truth be told, I felt this way in my twenties, single, and sans kiddies. Vogue would call me pathetic, I tell you. Pathetic! Lol

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  9. Haha this made me laugh: "Does making a mad dash down the driveway to fetch the morning paper count? My hunch is no." Been there. Except for me it was sneaking out to grab an Amazon package =P.

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    1. LOL!Joellen, you are my people. Heck, I'm the queen of mad dashes: Not only to get the paper, but 90% of the things I buy come from eBay, and the condition of my clothing -- or lack thereof -- when I retrieve said things from the front porch...smh...let's just say The Fashion Police would issue the worst kind of citation.

      And let's not even talk about when we had my fern on the porch last summer. I looked like a heathen when I went out to water that things every other morning.

      Welcome! Thank you for commenting.

      xo

      Delete
  10. This is a great post! Thanks for the laugh.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks so much, Monika! I appreciate your comment and hope you're having a fantastic weekend.

      xo

      Delete

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