Friday, January 31, 2014

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN NFL WIFE WHEN...

It’s a good thing I like football.

Because when you marry a man who has spent most of his life playing the game – and nearly seven of those years in the National Football League – football is not just a game, it’s a way of life. So in honor of the most popular weekend in American sports, I give you: You know you’re an NFL wife when…


1. Your husband snaps, crackles, and pops upon getting out of bed in the morning, and he’s not even 50.

2. When watching a game with your husband, he is able to identify – and announce – a penalty several seconds before the referee does.

3. Letters arrive in the mail at random from fans who kindly request that your husband autograph his enclosed football cards, and then send everything back in the self-addressed stamped envelope provided…all so that said fan can sell the cards for profit on eBay:

4. Your husband may be 6’6” and weigh over 300 pounds, but you think his size is average.

5. Your son’s first football jersey…is his dad’s:

6. Your husband possess two names: The one he was born with – and the nickname his teammates bestowed upon him after he was drafted. (The latter is used so frequently, it may as well be added to his birth certificate.)

7. You never tire of hearing all the stories from his playing days.

8. Complete strangers will talk $h!% about your husband’s team, and then turn right around and ask for his autograph...or...wait for it...ask if you can hook them up with tickets.

9. Your husband’s 3XL-sized professionally-framed jerseys adorn the walls of your home, becoming mainstays of the décor. They’re like Lay’s potato chips: You can’t have just one because there’s the home jersey, away jersey, college away jersey, college home, etc. Here is one of three in the hallway leading to our bedrooms:

10. Football will be worked into your wedding day ensemble, some way, somehow – i.e. a garter belt (or cough, cough, thong) bearing your husband’s team logo, a groom’s cake, etc. Yours truly may or may not have had these items in her possession (wink, wink):

For the remix of this list, click here.

And for more on the NFL, check out 7 misconceptions about an NFL wife and 


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18 comments:

  1. Ha! I love me some football (proud Chiefs fan here), but having people talk smack and then turn around and ask you for things has got to make your head spin. Keep these posts coming. Fascinating stuff to a lady who's husband doesn't play football, but does spend his Sunday's yelling at our TV.

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  2. LOL Thanks, Paige. As you are famous for saying: There is more where that came from! The yelling at the TV? That still happens around these parts, too. And about the people who talk smack...you learn to grow thick skin with a quickness.

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  3. Those shoes are fabulous!! Cute post! I enjoyed reading it. My husband is from Dearborn and still loves all of his Michigan/Detroit teams, except when they're playing his Texas teams. Enjoy the Super Bowl festivities! Stacie xo

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  4. Hi, Stacie!! OMG, I LOVE Dearborn. Very small world. Thank you for commenting!

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  5. Your son’s first football jersey…is his dad’s

    Sweetest. Thing. EVER. <3

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  6. Hey, Courtney, this post is great!
    # socialmediasaturday I followed, liked on FB and shared. Have a great weekend - I bet I know what you'll be doing! :)

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    1. Hi, Lexa! OMG -- thanks for your comment here -- and on FB...and, best of all, for becoming a reader! I truly appreciate it. (I'll actually be sharing another flashback story from a previous Super Bowl this coming Monday...) But as for this Sunday, yup, you know exactly what I'll be doing: change a diaper....eat more guacamole...watch the game...throw the Nerf to Scotty in the living room a bit...nurse Kennedy...repeat. LOL

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  7. Hi there! Following your blog from Social Media Saturday Link up! Would love if you'd follow back :)
    Bel
    http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/4668237/journeys-are-my-diary
    http://journeysaremydiary.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. Bel! Thanks so much...and nice to meet you! I gladly followed you back -- and I thank you for your follow as well. Enjoy your weekend...and thank you for commenting!

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  8. Mama C! (because part of me will always think of you as Mama C)
    I'm SO sorry that it took me so long to come over here. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the new blog, your tagline and how wonderful to see your gorgeous smiling face here too! YAYAYYYY!
    I'm from Denver so am rooting for the Broncos this year and thought your post about being NFL wife was awesome. Growing up, Winston Hill (old school NY Jets) lived in front of us. I remember going over there and loved looking at all the cool jerseys and photos in his basement/man cave.
    Was your garter really a team logo one? HA. happy weekend, friend. And again. SO sorry - I flagged your email and then completely...well...school for my son was cancelled almost all week long due to snow. That is at least partial excuse for me having no brain for two weeks, right?

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    1. Thank you, Kristi!!! (Shhhhh! I'm still Mama C around those other parts! LOL) Thank you for visiting me here, and for leaving this comment! Man, I bet Winston Hill's man cave was serious. And with regard to whether my garter really was a team logo one? Yup. Sure was. Both were -- the one that got tossed, and the one Scott kept. ;-) And, yes, you SO get a pass due to Tucker's school being cancelled. That's a hard one. The kids are constantly getting cancelled where we are in Michigan, too! It's Snowmageddon everywhere this winter! LOL

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  9. That pigskin stiletto pic is priceless! I laughed out loud all the way through this list. The nerve of some people. It's great you have a sense of humor about it all.

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    1. LOL Isn't that shoe perfect? Although, I can't tell you how many readers actually thought it was *my* shoe, and, alas, it's not. (I don't own anything nearly that high!)

      I have to have a sense of humor about this stuff...but, you are right: some people can be a trip. In fact, another envelope arrived in the mail today; the sender wanted Scott to sign four cards and mail them back!

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  10. Lol! Much of this rings true even for the semi pro! No more cartilage left in his knees, Neck and back out of alignment. Shoulder surgery and ripped both biceps. And I finally got him to stop playing flag football 2 years ago! They played regular football but with no equipment on! Come on! Plus he's 44 and the rest of the team was in their 20's!!

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    1. They can't let go, Susie...(smh)...they just can't let go...lol

      Hey, it's in their blood!

      Thank you for reading this post and commenting. xoxo

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  11. Okay, out of all honesty, the pigskin football stiletto drew me in and I started laughing after Snap, Crackle and Pop and, I know I should not have been, but it is written very well.

    LOL that people will take the time to mail a request so they can make a few dollars off of it, yeah, people can be well...

    6'6" and 300lbs. Yeah, my hubby is a little person, but don't tell him I said that.

    Great job and a very fun read! I needed to giggle today.

    Happy Tuesday and Let's Go Lions!

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    1. Hi, Yulunda!!! Nice hearing from you! Thank you for your comments, which also made me chuckle. :-) (And, yes, your secret is safe with me: I won't tell your hubs what you said. lol ;-)

      Guess where we were en route to when you were leaving your comment: We we actually pulling up to the Detroit Zoo to volunteer for an event that was being sponsored by the Detroit Lions. I've posted pics on my FB page, so take a look when you get a chance: https://www.facebook.com/thebrowngirlwithlonghair

      Thank you, again, my friend!

      xo

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